If Jail is the Big New Hollywood Career Move...

is there new ironic meaning to the old phrase she ''can't even get arrested''?

What does that mean for Nicole Richie's..er, ''career''? will she get some real lift off now, with the 82 minutes of time served? She sure looks happy.

What about Lindsey Lohan's one day? Does that mean these girls are on the way out or on the way up ? What does it all mean? !

Martha Stewart got many months (for really just being unlikable), and look what it did for her! She's got a new dynasty and bigger and better than ever, she even shook off that mean rep she had, it's cool to like her now, she has street cred as well as all the moolah.

They say the jails are too full in California and they can't be bothered with these petty issues like DUIs and small amounts of cocaine possession, which is why Lindsey Lohan is getting off lightly. Maybe that is true. But are they going easy on everyone, are the jails just as full if you're average unknown offender?

I had to wonder if the police and courts had their hands full in my own area...because for the third time I was pulled over and not cited, when the officer pulled me over and told me, laughing! That I had nearly crashed into his patrol car! I had swerved into his lane (I was rushing to get to my therapist's office, and a few minutes late, I merged without signaling and he was in my blind spot..he put on his loudspeaker and told me to pull into the nearest gas station parking lot).

I did so and was resigned to a ticket, pulling out my wallet and opening my dash to get the registration. The last two times, once in June when I'd gotten a field sobriety coming back from a club (for once i was glad to be out with a non drinker and as its no fun to drink alone, had had just ONE, but the pain pills from my recent broken wrist made me woozy and the officer said my eyes ''looked funny'' thus he put me through the ritual: walk a straight line, touch your nose, recite the alphabet etc. And to add to my crimes, I was not carrying my driver's licence, and had ''rolled'' through a stop sign.

I dodged that bullet and he let me go with a verbal warning, saying since I was a local and lived nearby, he'd let me go this time.

The other incident was in La Jolla when I ran a stop sign on the way to a party. That officer also let me go without a ticket - perhaps my excessively low cut shirt had something to do with it? he could have cited me on two counts, the stop sign and not having my california license yet.

So this last time, the third, I knew I must have run out of luck.

"Do you know why I pulled you over?" He asked. 'I guess because I didn't signal?" "You almost CRASHED right into my car, if I hadn't swerved out of the way, you would have hit me!'' he was laughing, like it was the funniest thing in the world. Never asked me for license, registration or insurance. ''I am SO sorry I said. ''I just wanted to tell you that!'' he said, continuing to laugh, walking away back to his police car. I kept my wallet in my hand, waiting for him to ask me to see my id, but he never did.

I kept thinking about the show I watch on channel called, One, Black men Revealed, as a professional eavesdropper it's dishy stuff..


where some guys sit around and talk very frankly among themselves, it's a fascinating show, you feel like you're in a man's locker room hearing the real dirt.
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Recently they were discussing the treatment they get based on complexion, ie, if a darker hued man is treated differently than lighter. They all had experiences of cops yelling at them OUT OF THE CAR, for no infraction at all, just DWB, and asking accusingly if this is their car if it's an expensive model. Was mine a DWB situation in reverse, driving while blonde instead of driving while black, or are the courts here in Southern California so overflowing with serious cases, they are looking the other way with minor scofflaws like me and Nicole Richie and Lindsey Lohan,and they have to chuckle and look the other way? Not that I'm complaining....

Sure never happened when I lived up north. They were pretty pitiless up there